Mental Health Matters: Overcoming Stress and Generational Trauma with Melissa Bennett-Heinz
- Dr. Tomi Mitchell
- Jun 11, 2024
- 2 min read
By Dr. Tomi Mitchell
Listen or subscribe for Free in your Favorite Podcast App
In this episode, I had the pleasure of sitting down with the wonderful Melissa Bennett-Heinz for a heart-to-heart conversation about the complexities of coping mechanisms, generational trauma, and the art of living a resilient life in the face of adversity.Melissa brings a wealth of wisdom and experience to the table as we discuss the phenomenon of retail therapy, the allure of distraction, and the cycle of stress that often leads to further anxiety. Melissa shares stories and insights that show how these coping mechanisms can sometimes exacerbate our struggles rather than alleviate them.We explore the impact of generational trauma on mental health and genetic predispositions, highlighting the importance of understanding and addressing these underlying factors. Melissa eloquently articulates how our experiences shape our choices and influence our resilience, emphasizing the power of self-awareness and compassion in fostering healing and growth.This episode is a powerful reminder that mental health is not a luxury reserved for a select few but a universal right that we must all prioritize. Melissa's insights inspire us to cultivate compassion for ourselves and others, to seek support when needed, and to embark on a journey of self-discovery and healing.So, join us as we explore the transformative journey from coping to courage and discover the profound wisdom that lies within. This is a conversation you won't want to miss.Key Takeaways:
Stress and trauma affect mental and physical health, causing anxiety and burnout.
Chronic stress can alter genetic predispositions, impacting future generations.
We can choose our responses to adversity and shape our experiences.
Therapy and supportive communities help navigate challenges with resilience
Transcript
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 0:06
Hello everyone, this is your host, Dr. Tomi Mitchell from the Mental Health and Wellness Show. Today I have the pleasure of introducing a guest. Her name is Anjani Mahabashya. She, like, well, two of us share many similarities. And we actually connected through LinkedIn which if you're not on LinkedIn as a professional, I think you're missing out. And we both shared what we call a soul crushing experience or experiences that led to that final blow, you're just like, okay, something needs to change. And I'm going to invite her to share her story, because I believe this story will empower so many of you not just physicians or healthcare workers, but individuals who feel like you've lost so much, but help you find redemption and hope after this point. And then also to shed some light issues that are really dear to those of us who are passionate in the healthcare field and the global healthcare crisis, and what we feel some of the steps need to happen to make this crisis reverse. So with no further ado, I'd love to introduce our guests, welcome.
Anjani Mahabashya 1:14
Dr. Michelle, thank you so much for the wonderful introduction. And I'm actually so inspired by everything you do. And thank you for creating this platform. And having me here, like you said, I have three takeaway points for our wonderful listeners here today. And the first one is hope, even when everything in your life seems to be falling apart. The second one is networking, to build your life back up. And the third one is empathy, empathy to yourself and to your community or anybody around you when your cup is full. Values were taught to me very early in my childhood by my father, and they are my greatest gifts. And today, I am so willing to share all my gifts with all our listeners. And we could get started from anywhere you'd like.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 2:01
Yeah, maybe share with the listeners your story, how you came to be going from, you know, clinical medicine to non clinical work.
Anjani Mahabashya 2:10
Great. I would like to give a little background of why I wanted to become a physician in the first place. You could probably pick up figured with my introduction that I absolutely loved my father and I lost him very young when I was only 12 years old. And I made a decision that I only wanted to be a doctor and nothing else. And I finished my medical school in India moved to the United States did my internal medicine residency in Michigan graduated in 2015. Ever since after that, I was working as a hospitalist and the career transition happened in a very unexpected way. Unfortunate injury that happened to me on my job. It was the 26th of November 2019. I say it you know a hallway changed my life. It was a hallway that I was taking to the emergency room to add met one of my patients and I had a terrible fall. And the only way I could walk home that day was on to crutches. When I went home, I realized that I actually couldn't use the restroom, like my whole leg was swollen, and I couldn't get on to the bed that night. I couldn't take a shower next day morning. And I'm like, I actually stopped drinking water because I was like, Oh, I can't go to the restroom. So I better not drink water. And I was all by myself. And that's when I realized oh my god, you know, life could just go like from me running 100 miles an hour. And you know, like doing 20 shifts straight of hospitals never getting tired traveling all around the world to being stuck in that apartment for more than one year. And I could just be a chatterbox. I could talk one hour and you know, would not let anybody else talk. But that silence that I experienced in my apartments was definitely something that I didn't see coming I wasn't prepared for it. I had no idea what was hitting me it was just like one tight slap on my face and like what what hit me just now I wasn't getting better, you know, one thing was getting added to another things were going downhill, complete spiral down and I wasn't able to perform the duties of a hospitalist on the crutches like you know things going wrong, I had a consequential injury in my good leg. And in that time, I actually exhausted my medical leave like the entire six months of medical leave and I was told that I have to be let go from the hospitalist job. And that was probably the most difficult phase of my life because I knew nothing other than being a doctor. It was my childhood dream. It was like my you know, it was something that was taking off like I really could see that 12 year old child like literally like shivering and crying that no like you can't take my brain this is not happening. That was the soul crushing experience like that one week that I cried and cried and cried like not knowing where do I begin now? Also because it was my career at stake. I was on a visa to to even stay in the United States anymore. And like my entire training was here like you know, I've been here for like, 10 plus years now, I'm talking even about 2019. So I didn't know anything else, how do I practice otherwise. And luckily, I actually started looking for a different kind of role. I knew about utilization management, but I didn't really start thinking about it immediately. However, when it like, you know, I started becoming serious about it. I started looking for jobs wasn't easy, Dr. Mitchell, because I was less than five years out of residency, no experience in utilization management, people will be like, Why do you want to leave clinical medicine, like, you know, they couldn't really like grasp a picture of my injury, and, you know, like, my situation and things like that. And I, in all honesty, it's God's grace that, you know, the position that I am in right now opened up in my system, but in a different location. So I contacted the medical director of this particular role, and I told them very honestly, Dr. Leszczynski, I do not know how to do this job. But given this job, I will work very hard. And he was so kind, he actually arranged a formal interview for me, and that's when I started studying for the boats that, like, you know, the the second boats that I took, and by the time I got to the interview, I had all the theory knowledge. So, you know, like, I was able to, like, answer every single question on my interview, and I knew I smashed it. And it was a little bit of like, time that happened. Before I was given this role due to some reasons of me being you know, like, they couldn't take me from the hospital immediately from where I was working a lot of like paperwork and stuff. But yeah, that's how I, the transition happened. And again, you know, it happened over a period of about 14 months, it was quite a lot, probably would take half an hour to go through like many, many other things.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 6:41
That's definitely a huge transition. And I'm sure you probably felt this way, a loss of identity, because an early age, you had dreamed to be a doctor, and that was also tied into love of your father. So it wasn't just you wanted to be a doctor, but there was there was a close bond, that forever eternal bond that you have with him, even though he's not physically here, you know, so that alone is a big shock, and then dealing with people's judgments and questions, sometimes, they mean, well, but they're like, What are you gonna do with your life? It's almost like you're not a doctor anymore. Like you're useless. Like what are you going to do? Right?
Anjani Mahabashya 7:18
Yes.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 7:18
And then being let go from the job that you've dedicated. a hospitalist is no joke. I've had my share of admissions and urgent like know the calls to in the morning and the day after day after day puts a toll on one you know, some people say that a physician or healthcare worker who's been working 24 hours is almost like a drunk the next step so we as physicians, we're walking around not drunk but as if you know, lack of sleep contributes to accidents, people falling, right and then you did the classical physician move. You went home, but you didn't go to the emergency you're like I got this I'll be fine. You will tell your patients to go get checked out.
Anjani Mahabashya 7:59
Oh, no, I was taken into the emergency room immediate.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 8:02
Good. Okay. I didn't hear that part of my. Did you just go home? Okay, and then you your injury? Because do you mind sharing with the listeners what type of injuries you sustained.
Anjani Mahabashya 8:12
I actually had a pull off the sciatic nerve on the left leg with a perineal injury, which led to the foot drop of the left leg. So you know, I was unknowingly putting a lot of weight on my right leg during the time that left leg was healing and that is when the right leg you know, had just gave up and the whole plantar facia Tibial Tendon everything was just like, you know, hurting and they were suspecting fluid in the ankle, you know, like I had multiple steroid injections, I don't even want to like remember them. So every joint was like being injected with steroid. So it was just too much to like, you know, taken every two, three months, some of the other procedures, multiple MRIs, multiple EGS, or something like that, that was going on. So again, that's where like you and I was talking about the navigation through healthcare system as a patient now was, oh my god, you know, like, I have to figure out all these appointments, figure out how to go to this appointment. And you know, it was a COVID here, so like, you know, drop me your pick me up, and you know, like, I had to do it all by myself. And it was just never ending. And to add to your point, Dr. Mitchell, we do so much. However, like, we rarely have somebody to ask us, you know, did you sleep? Do you have food to eat? Like, you know, that's such a basic question to ask somebody. And I feel like, you know, we are deprived of a lot of things. We either go home alone, or we go home to more responsibilities. You know, it's never like, I have something somebody to hold my hand or, you know, pat on my back and say, I got your back. So yeah, I think it's just very, very crazy world that we live in.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 9:50
Yes, definitely. Crazy world and the timing you injured in November, then you didn't know that. You know, five months later or so there'll be this global pandemic announced and shutdowns and you're like, well, I still need therapy. I still need a doctor. I still need help. Right? You're still in the early healing stage because you're not better six months later.
Anjani Mahabashya 10:10
Yes, yes. And six months later was the consequential injuries I actually worsened?
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 10:14
Yeah.
Anjani Mahabashya 10:15
And so, yeah, that's where I was. And it was quite a lot of and again, you know, like, I was gaining weight very rapidly. That was just another, you know, whole thing going on, or like, not fitting into clothes. And but my brain worked well, at least in this part. Dr. Mitchell, I would say this to all the women, please, I hear a lot of people say, why don't you lose some weight and then buy that dress? Or, you know, why don't you lose some weight and then buy those, you know, pants, I did not do that. I just bought beautiful clothes. Trust me, like, you know, branded really beautiful coats, I got them freaking imported from UK. And, you know, like, I wore two sizes bigger, I first took care of myself. I was like, you know, let me feel good. I respected my body. And once that I started, like, you know, accepting that No, I will first take care of like, whatever I look, I will break my body with dignity. And that's it, my brain started working, I started preparing for the second boards. And then I went ahead and you know, I could get this job, you cannot deal with so many things at one time. You know, when you play this full, you have injuries, you don't have a job, you have aid, you have everything. So please pick one battle at a time do not like you know, try to do like multiple things. And I don't know, like, you know, it worked out for me. And I think like, you know, we should stop depriving ourselves of like these little things of you know, even buying clothes, why I don't get it.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 11:37
I love that expression you use drape yourself with dignity.
Anjani Mahabashya 11:40
Yes.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 11:40
That is so beautiful. That is so true. Don't, yes, you know that your outer exterior shell isn't where it needs where you want it to be due to contributing factors, but you still have enough grace, like I deserved, I can still dress well, even if you have to go up to sizes, right. And as a woman who's you know, had things happened to me even pregnancy, weight gain, and that shifts the way you you can look at your body, if you're not mindful. Like it's like, okay, I didn't have this extra weight here or these extra curves, but still being able to carry yourself with dignity and look good, regardless of your size.
Yes. And when you respect yourself, people will respect you, when you respect their time, people will respect your time. When you respect who you are and what job you do. People will respect you. And I made sure that I do it time and again, it's like a breathing exercise. I know you breathe every day. You do this every single day, you set that boundary every single day. That's what I did.
So you know, during this transition, obviously, we go through stages of grief, and I'm sure you did the anger bargaining denial, like, Oh, we're too young for this. Is this too early in my career? I've worked so hard. And then the insecurity of knowing can you stay in this country based on your visa status? Right? Yes, that's a challenge. Definitely. And okay, but I still have bills to pay, you know, maybe you have student loans or medical school, or medical school isn't cheap.
Anjani Mahabashya 13:08
Yes. But that for me, I'm from India. But you know, but you know, like, I had bills to pay, like, you know, I had a lavish lavish lifestyle. So that's her coming any cheap. So yeah, like, it was.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 13:18
Right.
Anjani Mahabashya 13:19
You know, like, oh, I cannot do what I was doing all these, like, years or months. So yeah.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 13:24
But the beautiful thing, you are able to leverage your knowledge as a physician, right? So a co role of leadership. And this is something before we started recording, we're talking about this, how there are people who are making health choices that impact both health, and they have next to no health experience, and they don't actually know what's happening on the graph.
Anjani Mahabashya 13:47
Yes.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 13:47
They're clueless. And it was interesting, I was just what looking at LinkedIn, or before I got on this call together, and film was talking about that, like physicians, we, the world needs us, especially those of you who are courageous who can look outside the box, and who could speak the truth, even if you know, it might not be the most popular choice, but you know, morally, it is necessary to speak because, you know, deep inside, why you became a doctor, and it's not to be a puppet?
Anjani Mahabashya 14:17
Yes.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 14:17
You things just go haywire.
Anjani Mahabashya 14:20
Yeah, I completely agree on that. And this gives me an opportunity to describe what role I got into move in the United States, you know, my might be able to quickly look up and understand what this role is, and it's physician advisor. So it's a bridge between the leadership and physicians and what I actually do is, I talk to the insurance companies who are probably, you know, not really paying us the money that we you know, rightly deserve if we provided some care or we're actually looking at value based care, you know, okay, now this patient should should this patient be an observation or inpatient what are we doing and most of the times physicians we are pulled in, so happy. You don't know what's the insurance doing? I mean, I, when I was a physician, I had no idea what are you talking about? You know, so for me, like my role was to provide education to the physicians to the extent that is needed for them. I'm not going to bombard them with all the knowledge I have, but just enough so that they understand when I'm approaching them, you know why we're doing this, just taking that time giving presentations to explain them the why once they knew the why, why are we doing what we're doing? Why is it important to stick with Medicare guidelines? And why is it important to have these patients in right status? What happens if it doesn't work out? You know, does it affect the patient satisfaction score? Or does it affect our billing, you know, revenues? Or does it invite an unnecessary audit from Medicare? Nobody wants that. So I think once our physicians in my entire system understood the why, you know, once they understood why we are doing this, they were easily able to, like, you know, come on board with us and change those orders, because we are catching them at the wrong time. You know, when you're running around, like, you know, doing something or you know, you're delivering a baby, I'm going after an OBGYN. Can you change this order? You know, what I'm going after a surgeon, you know, middle of the surgery, hey, can you do this? So it's all about, you know, just telling them the why and not also giving them time to do things, you know, when they have a breeder, you know, when they're able to do that, just being having that empathy for them that, you know, like, yeah, I was there, you know, I knew, I probably know what they're going through. So I don't usually bombard them in the morning times, I'd keep the charts, which I can probably hold off to the afternoon. And that actually quite helped and just listening out to them, you know, what are they feeling like, you know, why do they feel that this needs to be this way? Sometimes it's all about, you know, listening to them, it just makes me understand where they're coming from, and then you can always clarify, okay, okay, this, this is probably the knowledge gap I have, or they have something is probably like, you know, not fitting here. So that really helped me, you know, to build that bond. And with my injury, I think the best thing that I've learned as a nurturing that it's an everyday thing, you know, any relationship whether it is personal or professional, it needs nurturing every single day. Like, I love to make that like bond connection with the entire utilization management team, the nurses every single day, you know, like, I want to crack a joke, like, you know, I'm in a good mood, I will crack a joke. So you have to put up with my humor. If it's a Friday, I am going to like, you know, probably like have delayed responses. And then I'm working but you know, I just want to like, okay, so, it's just a way of, you know, just being there and you know, showing who you actually are and you know, people you welcome that they really like it.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 17:36
Definitely I resonate with the laughter I know those who know me have worked with me they know when I'm coming for one or two things before BC before children and before COVID. It was my heels because I was Miss fashionista. Okay, I corrupt heels pencil skirt looking polished like.
Anjani Mahabashya 17:54
I love that.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 17:54
You know what I mean? Hair makeup on point every day. That was me coming in bubbly and smiling. And then the AC after children after COVID. While I tend not to wear the sneak the heels as much as more like flats, but the laughter piece is there that joy that happiness, it helps change the atmosphere of where you are. Smiling don't cost you anything.
Anjani Mahabashya 18:19
It doesn't cost anything.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 18:20
Really is important.
Anjani Mahabashya 18:22
It is. So I'm very silly at my work sometimes with nurses, you know, I like to be like that just so that we kind of decompress a situation. Like it's not always like, you know, like, okay, you know, you're escalating thing. I'm like, okay, so I make a joke if there is an escalation going on, just because I don't want them to like everybody to feel stressed out. It's rare, but I like to make fun of things. I actually even my presentations are funny, you know, like I have these cartoons of performing surgery and somebody brings a phone and says, This is a text from Dr. Mahabashya, you know, like, at first make them laugh that, you know, yeah, I know that I catch you at the wrong time is very well known at. So what do you do? Then they laugh and they are with you. Like, you know, they know that. Yeah, that I know what I'm doing like a troublemaker.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 19:06
Yes. They know your plan. They know the joy and they know they have good intention, that smile is priceless.
Anjani Mahabashya 19:11
That is correct.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 19:12
In your work and work you do with other people, you often share this idea which you had to learn the hard way when you really didn't have much support. And then you had a pandemic, how you really had to become your own cheerleader. I really had to self talk your way through. And, you know, can you elaborate that just for our listeners how this is so important? Yes, it's good to have that external. Like, you know, good job. You did good. But more importantly, we have to find it from within.
Anjani Mahabashya 19:42
Yes, I do a lot of self talk like and I think like I said, I see myself that well, your old child in India who fought every single battle and came to the United States. And I'm like, I feel like you know, I am having the child in my house. And I'm not going to her. Let her cry or letter, you know, have a heartbreak. So I think, then you just when you don't have anybody, I don't complain that Oh, I don't have this, I don't have that I don't have so and so what do I have? Okay? Can I afford a housekeeper? I can, can I afford somebody to cook for me? I can. So why don't I like you know, like this, like, you know, get some help for yourself like you know it, you can always earn the money back later on, just forget about it. So take care of yourself, when it is like really, really needed, get those extra, you know, size of clothes, have somebody to help you out with your shorts, I don't know, like, I will just like, I would purposely go to get a manicure and pedicure done. Like, you know, I would like really like schedule all these things. And luckily, you know, like, I think I run into people with a good humor. So that one hour of getting those little things done. I'm like laughing with them. I'm talking about all kinds of nonsense. And it's just those little things that you know, you do everything very mindfully, like, instead of thinking about why something is not happening with me, I'm like, what is that I can do for myself, I shifted that. And the other thing is the other relay of happiness that got added on was when I started working with the nonprofit as a volunteer. And before I get too much into that, I want to give a broad view of what happens when you are a giver, when you start giving you surround yourself with givers. And what do givers do givers give so they're not only giving the people that you know you're giving they will give you to and that's what happened to me. I surrounded myself with givers. And then like I started like seeing all these things like opportunities literally flowing to me, you know, like they were like helping me out because they're givers. You know, when they see me hurt they want to give? And I'm like, Oh, wow, you know, when people see people helping others, for example, at my workplace, when they see me doing this community service, they are now the cheap cheerleaders. But the first move of going there to the community service I had to make.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 21:54
You were the catalyst, right?
Anjani Mahabashya 21:56
Yeah.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 21:57
How this start?
Anjani Mahabashya 21:57
Yes, they're all like happy that, you know, I'm doing this, you know, like, if I have to get out of work like, you know, 15 minutes early so that I can get to that senior citizen and help them. Nobody. They're like people help givers. So it's a beautiful thing to be a giver. You know, like, a lot of times we don't realize it, and we're always like, what do I get from this person? What do I get from that person? Not really try this at work.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 22:19
It definitely does. I you know, I've seen it in my life, just being a happy giver, as well, is like, it's amazing how people respond to you, once you've sown seeds of kindness, where you've taken the time to listen to them and make them feel like they matter. Right? And when they see that, you know, as a human being, you have your own challenges. But you're still coming off with a great attitude, taking the time being a team player and being generous, versus gonna come back to you.
Anjani Mahabashya 22:52
Yes.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 22:53
And I'm so glad you you saw that.
Anjani Mahabashya 22:55
Yes, it came back to you as Dr. Mitchell. I don't know what you saw in that one message that I wrote you. It's not that one message. It's the life, it's the energy of the universe and needs to believe in that. So that's what I believed and and that I continue to believe in that. And it can, it continues to work in my favor. And I would like to talk a little about my nonprofit and you know.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 23:17
Sure.
Anjani Mahabashya 23:17
Thank you. So like I said, you know, everything was going well at my work. And I was doing very well at my work. And unexpectedly a door opened where I had an opportunity to work with senior citizens in my community. And I was like, Oh, great, I'm gonna teach them technology. And I'm like, yeah, this is easy, you know, like instant access to certain pieces of technology. It's not like, you know, like some kind of like a real physical work. And I went there and I was heartbroken. They were so lonely painting or actually craving for a human, they were really like, you know, they just wanted somebody to listen to them to their stories. And I was like, this is all I wanted, you know, I just wanted to just, you know, somebody to like, hold my hand or listen to me. And I immediately connected to their loneliness and just spending about two hours per senior citizen and teaching them how to use their iPads or iPhones now they're able to see their beautiful grandchildren going to their favorite song on YouTube. And they can also see, like, everything has become Zoom call these days, most of the doctor's appointments and they are now able to make those appointments and you know, talk to their doctors online. And they're not ending up in emergency rooms, because like they're not able to get in like in person. Everything is connected in life, every single thing is connected. And I do this out of you know, like, I just wanted to be there for somebody and have that feeling of, you know, wow, empathy can move mountains, that.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 24:42
Empathy can move mountains. And you know, the thing with empathy, what a prerequisite oftentimes is, you haven't gone through challenges. Otherwise it's more sympathy, right? Because empathy is like you can put you can relate to them.
Anjani Mahabashya 24:57
You can relate.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 24:58
Right because you know what it's like to be physically challenged, while your mind is still there, but your body has been written off. You understand the importance of connection and how it feels when you don't have the loneliness, the pain, the negative talk that comes in your mind, and how much more the seniors who thought, well, they're much older. Some people don't have families that visit them anymore. They feel like they're rejected in society. They're not valued, right.
Anjani Mahabashya 25:26
Useless is the word. You know, they vote.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 25:28
Yeah, I know.
Anjani Mahabashya 25:29
That's how horrible you know, people said, I'm like, No, I would love to hear from you. And Dr. Michelle, every single time I go there, they call me beautiful. Fabulous. Fantastic. What not like, who doesn't want a year though?
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 25:41
I know.
Anjani Mahabashya 25:42
I mean, like, you know, they give me hugs. I just coughed once. And three people ran in different directions to get me water. Before I leave that place, people are checking, you know, how is the weather? Can she go now? I don't know what to say. You know, like, I think how can somebody be like, you know, left, like, that is such beautiful people. I think that was the best experience of my life, being a healthcare provider of everything else I have done actually, to be honest.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 26:06
Definitely. I can relate I in my career, I did about three years. Why did home visits for seniors and care homes, and some of them I actually came to their homes, because I guess I was old school. But I mean, just seeing the little bases brighter, and they check on you. And they ask you questions. I remember I had a 93 year old patient and she's like, Doc, I think you're tired. You need to get more sleep. I allow my lap because I like talking to a 93 year old that I have. But she's right. I'm like, Thank you. You're rare, right? And the next time she's like, did you sleep? Or it was a running joke is like, Okay, what did you eat for breakfast? Because I had a habit of skipping breakfast, did you? What did you eat? and I were like, I'm a good girl, I ate ABCD. And I'm so proud of myself. But I mean, that whole banter that remember the conversation, remembering little things about them, which are significant. Right, making them feel like they valued given them utility use. So beautiful.
Anjani Mahabashya 27:02
They're so beautiful, they want to come out, they want to help children, they want to be useful. And like everything with all the projects that were introduced with them, they just are so happy. And all that they're craving for the human connection, everybody eat because there's looking for a human connection is looking for validation is looking for love. It doesn't have to be traditional, it doesn't have to be like one way or the other, I would just say if you really feel something, go out into the world, find something out of the box, you will find so much more love, just not the conventional way.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 27:31
Very, very good. Very good point, I really appreciate your share the pain, you went through the you know, the loss, early loss, but realizing that you still have so much to give, and the open you have the openness to try something different, right? For many physicians who are like you, for different reasons, know that something needs to give in their life, and they're not willing to sacrifice their health any longer. Like taking this bold step is really, really powerful. I remember when I let go of my practice, people like oh, you're retiring, you're not gonna be a doctor anymore. I'm like, Okay, I'm, I'll always be a doctor, you're not gonna take the MD away from me. But I'm gonna leverage that experience. And in a place where I can make a change actually wants to have change. I don't, I don't like wasting my time with people who don't want to change. It's like, like you're healing, you're gonna hit your head against the wall so many times, and you just like, you know, a lot of this is coming out over this. And that's why I felt.
Anjani Mahabashya 28:30
So true. I actually feel so such huge fulfillment because I have a team, I have a boss that had a huge empathy to give me a position with zero experience. And he gave me those skills to perform my job at so beautifully. And I did well in no time. You know, like, I was really surprised. I'm like, wow, people like me.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 28:50
Well, I'm not surprised. You will, whatever you do, will turn to gold. And you will do well, like, you know, please you.
Anjani Mahabashya 28:57
Thank you Dr. Mitchelll, just like you have been sweet since the beginning to me.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 29:03
Oh my pleasure.
Anjani Mahabashya 29:03
Thank you. And so I feel like you know, like, I'm fighting for the patients. When I'm in the hospital, like I'm fighting with insurance companies, I want the patient to benefit. And when I come to the community, I am fighting for the social determinants of health. I don't want people to feel lonely. I don't want them to feel like you know, that nobody's like asking for them or you know, like, I just feel like I'm blessed to be in this particular phase of my life where I'm actually having a very fulfilling job inside the hospital and outside the community. And I have a big vision actually, I want all the healthcare systems and the insurance companies to invest in our communities and build healthier communities. Because when we build healthy communities, when our mind is right, everything else, you know falls in place and the health care costs will come down and it is going to happen.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 29:54
Yes, you speak my language. I frequently talk about instruments of household I just want to help like if you let some want to release them into the community and they don't have the housing support. You know, the literacy skills or whatever it is you think they're going to do well, no, they demand that right back in the hospital probably more complicated and whatever medical diagnosis you gave them, but if you don't look at the bigger picture, then you've done a disservice.
Anjani Mahabashya 30:15
Yes.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 30:15
And we need to as a society change the way we look at health and life and take what we call a holistic approach.
Anjani Mahabashya 30:22
Yes. I love it. Yes. And I would like to also add when I actually was in your Dr. Mitchell, I really did not have them. That's why I say networking is important to see what kind of help you have around you. I really did not know that there will be so many doctors such as you who would be coaching spare, you know, if I came to you and said, Dr. Mitchell, I'm dying, like my hole is soulless tearing apart as a doctor, you will understand what I'm going through, but I just did not know that such kind of help existed, which is why I think we have to start networking before something hits us, you know, and working is important.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 30:57
Definitely networking before something hits us.
Anjani Mahabashya 31:01
Yes.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 31:02
100% true. 100%, be friendly find tribe, smile.
Anjani Mahabashya 31:07
Smile and find out you know, like not when something hits you, of course, like I had to learn it the hard way. But you know, find out what the laws are, you know, find out like what kind of help you can have, you know, what kind of coaching you can have, what kind of therapist you can go to how can you like so, the other thing I feel is, you know, like, yeah, we go to a doctor if our leg breaks, but what about our soul breaks? You know, why do we ignore that? You know, like, I mean, would you get to Harvard? Or would you get to like, you know, with whatever Stanford with a broken leg, you go to a doctor, you know, so you cannot get to those heights with a broken soul. So you have to take care of it.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 31:43
Yeah. Brilliant, powerful, and that but in a work. That is I feel in your your insides are beautiful, amazing transformation.
Anjani Mahabashya 31:52
Yes.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 31:53
And it worked that soul work, which is eternal is key. Love it. I love the work you do. I really appreciate you sharing your story.
Anjani Mahabashya 32:01
Thank you so much.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 32:01
You're welcome. And to those who are listening, especially those of you who maybe are physicians are really thinking about everything, really get grounded with your big why go back to that little child because usually most of us were were children, when we decided we're going to be a doctor.
Anjani Mahabashya 32:17
Yes.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 32:17
Back to the why. And if what you're doing is reflecting that why, and if not? Well, we got to ask, why not?
Anjani Mahabashya 32:28
Curious, why did you go to say that external? Like, why not? I like it.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 32:33
That was the one to spot.
Anjani Mahabashya 32:35
Oh, it was perfect. It was on the spot, actually.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 32:38
Thank you. Well, thank you. For listeners who want to get a hold of you, how do they reach you?
Anjani Mahabashya 32:43
LinkedIn is the best way. My messaging option is open for everybody. So you could reach out whether you want to look for a role a physician advisor or you just want to like, you know, talk to me, I'm ready to listen, you know, and yeah, I can give some time stuff love. So yeah, it could be like, okay, let's do this to get out.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 33:01
Love was important that's good, you definitely listen, because that's how we connected. Like, you're both responsive to the synergy, right? And if it's yourself in the right community, you find your tribe.
Anjani Mahabashya 33:13
Yes. If you feel like you're, you know, takers or toxic people, you know, then you givers if you want to, like, you know, be with somebody that wants to, like, you know, lose weight in a holistic way, you know, not like, oh, I want to fit into this press, go be with that tribe, because they're not going to like disappoint you. And it's going to be like more of an uplifting kind of anything, any situation. Anybody who uplifts is a winner, Dr. Michelle, you know, of criticism gets you anywhere in life, you know, it's probably just buttom.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 33:41
You hit your brick wall eventually.
Anjani Mahabashya 33:43
Oh yes and very quickly.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 33:46
Great. Yes. Well, thank you, listeners. Thanks for sharing this hour with us. As always, if this message this conversation was a blessing to you. Please give us a five star and share with your family and friends. Okay, we're really here to make a difference and make a little heaven on earth. Right?
Anjani Mahabashya 34:04
Yes.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 34:04
And this is good.
Anjani Mahabashya 34:05
Yes.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 34:06
In humanity.
Anjani Mahabashya 34:07
Have empathy yourself and for your support and for the community, you will see things will shift the universal energy so powerful that give you back so much more than what it takes.
Dr. Tomi Mitchell 34:18
100% that self compassion have empathy and those laws of the universe Law of Attraction bathe however you call it will do its work. Thank you so much. And thank you, this is Dr. Mitchell from the Mental Health and Wellness Show. Bye.
Anjani Mahabashya 34:32
Bye.
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