Small Daily Choices Matter—But Let’s Talk About the Big Shifts That Change Your Life

By Dr. Tomi Mitchell

We’ve all heard it:

“Just take small steps.”

“Progress is progress.”

“Be consistent—it all adds up.”

And yes, there’s truth there. But let’s be honest: a few 5-minute journaling sessions, a gratitude list scribbled before bed, or even an occasional morning walk don’t change your life trajectory if the core of your existence is out of alignment.

Small choices are a beautiful entry point. They’re digestible, gentle, and safe. But let’s not pretend they’re the whole picture. Because when your nervous system is fried, your boundaries are flimsy, and your day-to-day life is running on autopilot, a checklist of “mindful habits” won’t save you. Not long-term.

The Illusion of Incrementalism

If small changes were the secret to transformation, more people would thrive in purpose, health, and peace. But they’re not. Real, liberating, next-level growth often requires something bigger, something messier, something braver.

It requires significant shifts—the kind that make you stop mid-scroll, put your phone down, and whisper to yourself: I can’t keep living like this.

So, What Is Real Growth About?

It’s not about bubble baths and green juice, not at its core.

It’s about peeling back the layers—belief systems, routines, environments—that once felt like home but are now suffocating you. It’s about being brave enough to ask, “Who did I become while trying to survive—and who am I ready to be now?”

As a physician and holistic coach, I work with high-achievers—people who look polished on the outside but are quietly burning out on the inside. Together, we don’t just talk about wellness. We talk about identity. We dismantle what's no longer serving them and rebuild from the inside out.

This is more than self-care. It’s self-leadership.

Small Steps Work—But Only If You’re Headed Somewhere Honest

Neuroscience backs the value of small actions. James Clear talks about the 1% rule: minor improvements, repeated daily, compound into powerful change.

But here’s the caveat: if your 1% is moving you in the wrong direction—or maintaining a life you’re no longer aligned with—you’re just reinforcing the status quo.

Small steps are helpful when starting from burnout, grief, or trauma. They help stabilize your nervous system. But if you’ve stabilized and are still stuck, the issue isn’t your discipline—it’s your strategy.

Growth isn’t just about doing more. It’s about choosing better.

Sometimes, You Have to Rip the Band-Aid Off

Let’s say plainly: sometimes the glow-up isn’t soft or gradual—it’s disruptive.

Sometimes it looks like:

• Ending a relationship that’s been quietly draining your energy for years.

• Leaving a job that pays well but slowly erodes your spirit.

• Changing your morning routine because scrolling in bed and chugging caffeine kills creativity.

• Deleting social media for 30 days—not because it’s “bad,” but because your brain needs silence more than stimulation.

• Investing in a coach or therapist—not because you’re broken, but because you’re finally ready to grow with intention.

  
  

Big doesn’t mean chaotic or impulsive. It means deliberate. Aligned. Necessary.

But Here’s What Usually Gets in the Way:

People don’t resist change because they’re lazy. They resist because change threatens identity.

Growth requires you to become unfamiliar with yourself for a while. And that’s uncomfortable.

Many of us are scared, not of failure, but of who we must become to succeed. We’re afraid of disappointing others. Of standing out. Of being too much. Or worse, not enough.

So we play it safe. We stay “busy.” We wait for clarity to arrive like a divine sign, forgetting that clarity is often born from movement, not stillness.

The Three Relationships That Define Your Growth

In my work, I help clients examine the three relationships that shape everything:

1. Your Relationship with Yourself – This includes your thoughts, habits, values, and the stories you tell yourself about what’s possible.

2. Your Relationship with Others – Friends, family, colleagues. Who affirms your growth? Who fears it? Who are you shrinking for?

3. Your Relationship with Society/Work – The systems you operate in. Are you bending to fit their mould, or creating new models that serve you?

   
   

When these relationships are misaligned, personal development feels like swimming upstream. But momentum becomes inevitable when you start making aligned decisions across these domains.

Your Growth Strategy Should Match Your Ambition

Let’s retire the idea that you can dream big and act small forever. At some point, the math doesn’t add up.

If your vision is bold, your growth plan needs to be bolder

Not frantic or perfectionistic—but focused. Clear. Strategic.

You need:

• A framework that’s tailored to you

• A timeline that respects your season of life

• Accountability that goes deeper than a reminder app

• And, yes, the courage to make decisions that scare you a little, because comfort is not the goal. Liberation is.

  
  

This isn’t hustle culture. This is conscious realignment.

Stop Settling for Maintenance

We do maintenance when we’re scared to disrupt what’s “working.” But surviving isn’t the same as thriving. You weren’t born to preserve a lukewarm life.

You were born to evolve. To expand. To make decisions your future self will thank you for—even if they’re uncomfortable today.

So, I’ll ask you directly:

• Where are you mistaking stagnation for “stability”?

• What radical move have you been avoiding, but can no longer ignore?

• Who do you want to become by this time next year—and what decisions will get you there?
  

Because here’s the hard truth: you can’t build a powerful life on autopilot. You need to be awake. Alive. Intentional.

Final Word: The Work Is Worth It

No, you probably won’t change your whole life overnight. But you can take one brave step today. One decision that realigns you. One bold move that signals to the universe—and yourself—that you’re serious.

The path to meaningful transformation isn’t linear or always graceful. But it is yours to choose.

So here’s your permission slip—not just to stretch gently into the next version of you, but to leap.

To pivot. To release. To restructure. To reclaim.

You don’t owe the world your exhaustion. You owe yourself your evolution.

And if you're ready to design that next chapter—clear, bold, and aligned—I'll be right here. Challenging you and cheering you on. And walking with you, one decisive shift at a time.

Dr. Tomi Mitchell

Physician. Coach. Strategist. Unapologetic believer in bold personal evolution.Helping high-performers build lives that don’t just look good, but feel deeply right.